Today, May 1st is a national Public Holiday in Spain and this weekend is a puente (bridge), or long weekend for people to escape and do something enjoyable. That is, unless you're one of the majority unemployed, when really, Worker's Day (celebrated by not working), doesn't seem much different to any other day.
Día del Trabajador (May Day), like most Bank Holiday weekends (anywhere), means roads come to a chaotic standstill as everyone tries to escape elsewhere and return later, while road deaths - through excess speed - increase in inverse proportion. It's an illogical conundrum, for which I have no explanation.
Had we been able to tell you earlier, you could have gone along and protested in Santa Cruz at mid-day about the terrible conditions in your job (if you have one), or the lack of one (if you don't). The aim was to "publicly denounce the systematic loss of rights that workers suffer, with the excuse of the current economic crisis." They do.
Interestingly, it is reported that Spanish PM, José Luis Rodríguez Zapatero, is putting off the execution of measures against the crisis in the Canary Islands, until June. Funny that, when something goes wrong on the islands, it's Central Government's job to provide the funds and the wherewithal to fix it. At all other times, Central Government is accused of meddling and not leaving the regions to govern themselves. An idiom involving cake and eat it, comes to mind.
The Pios of Las Palmas [Gran Canaria] couldn't manage to beat Tenerife in the local derby last week, but they just had to get one back and win this weekend ...
... with the first suspected case of the gripe porcina (swine flu) in the Canaries. The sniffler is a 28 year old male who had travelled to Mexico recently and who's state of health is described as "satisfactory."
Of course, the virus can't be called gripe porcina (swine flu) now, presumably because the WHO considered it politically incorrect and racist against pigs. Should we change it and follow historical convention, such as was used for the 1918 Spanish Flu or 1969 Hong Kong Flu outbreaks, then?
Clearly something needed doing, because it wasn't just the media in English that was getting a bit carried away with panic mongering. Some Canarian and Spanish sources had begun calling it "peste porcina", which translates to porky pestilence or plague, like it's 1350, with bodies in streets and crosses on doorways.
But who in their right mind, will go round telling their friends, "Sorry, I can't come to the pub tonight, 'coz I have a nasty case of influenza A(H1N1)?"
Ain't. Gonna. Happen.
But top marks to ABC in Las Palmas, for coming up with a useable alternative:
They've called it "nueva gripe", which translates to new flu. I suggest that in English, we should spell this nu-flu, which sounds more funky, 2009.
A Wiltshire Chimney Lining company should get a bonus boost in trade! 
Masking the symptoms: While we're on naming conventions and boosts in trade, you may like to know that the co-operative that the supplies farmacias (chemists) in Tenerife is called Cofarte (remembering that the final letter "e" is never pronounced by English speakers) and they're reporting an "exaggerated and unjustified" increase in the demand for surgical masks.
The worry was that front-line medical staff would be left without and, the head of the College of Pharmacists is calling for calm amongst the island population.
The same article states that it has been prohibited, since last Monday, to distribute the anti-viral drug, Tamiflu, to chemists in Tenerife. This is to prevent indiscriminate use that might cause people to become resistant to the drug, which in turn would prevent it being effective later.
Mayday: Humm ... I just can't imagine there being any anti-social, isolated, uncontagious things to do in Tenerife this weekend. Oh, maybe walking alone in the mountains, but otherwise the Tenerife culture just doesn't do anti-social.
The biggest events on the island this weekend are the International Paragliding Festival, FLYPA 2009 and the Fiestas de Mayo / Fiestas de la Cruz (May Fiestas or Fiestas of the Cross.) See decorated crosses in Güímar and Puerto de la Cruz and catch the 3 hour firework battle in Los Realejos on May 3rd.
The corridor stretches interminably before me punctuated by open doorways, some of which are portals to small empty rooms while others lead to corridors which matrix into hundreds more rooms and yet more corridors. The walls are graffiti’d stone with naked wires protruding at intervals along their length and beneath my feet cement dust and rubble cover small beige tiles. In places the plaster has fallen from the ceiling revealing hollow space beneath the roof. Through the glassless windows the sun’s blinding glare bounces around the dry scrubland rippling the air on the horizon above the ocean.
The echo of my footsteps is joined by the incessant cry of the wind which is following my every move, darting through open windows and rushing down corridors. At each new doorway I stop and peer inside at rusting bed frames and discarded Coke tins. Most of the cells are small squares with a tiled bathroom in one corner where fittings have been roughly torn from the wall leaving patches of exposed plaster in the tiling.
Feeling like a character in a Sergio Leone movie or on a level of Silent Hill, each new doorway holds the threat that I might stumble across a squatter, an itinerant or the ghost of one of the inmates this village was built to house. I’m peering into the gloom of a particularly dark room when there’s an explosion of noise directly behind me which sends my heart crashing into my ribcage and my head and neck sinking into my shoulders . My hair follicles register movement as the panic stricken wings of a pigeon flap the air centimetres from my head. I must have spooked it as it dozed in one of the gaps in the wall. The pigeon takes an erratic flight path beneath the low ceiling before veering through a window frame to the right and into the glare.
A couple of weeks ago Jack stumbled across an article about a ghost town on Tenerife’s Arico coast beside the TF1 motorway; an entire abandoned village which was constructed to house lepers. Despite frequent trips to the south of the island and an afternoon searching that exact area looking for the ‘Happy Donkeys’ (that’s another story) we’d never spotted anything that could remotely fit the bill of what the article was describing. So on Thursday, on our way back from a meeting in the south of the island, we decided to seek the ghost village out.
Leaving the TF1 and driving down to the beaches of Abades the outline of the empty church with its huge stone cross and 30 or so deserted buildings shone out from the headland like a beacon. How on earth we had managed not to see the village before now is baffling. I can only think that as Abades looks newly built we must have taken the empty buildings for just a half completed project, which in essence it is; only this one’s over 60 years old.
The village was originally conceived at the end of the Spanish Civil War when leprosy was rife, Tenerife alone having 197 known cases. The policy at that time was to house sufferers in isolation in a climate that was considered beneficial to health; hence the choice of the arid, sunny and breezy east coast of Tenerife, miles away from any large population centres. Under Franco’s command plans to build a vast leper sanatorium and place it under control of the military were put into place.
Designs were drawn up by José Enrique Marrero Regalado, a local architect from Granadilla de Abona whose works include the African Market in Santa Cruz and the Basilica in Candelaria.
Work was suspended in the 1940s when the use of Dapsone in the treatment of leprosy provided a breakthrough in halting progress of the disease and it was determined that sufferers responded better to treatment in the comfort of their own homes.
Building work stopped and the site was abandoned.
In 2002 an Italian developer bid for the site from Arico ayuntamiento and work began to create a huge tourist complex with a golf course and 3,000 beds. But in 2003 the Ley de Moratoria Turística (building moratorium) was passed which severely restricted the size and type of tourism developments permitted within open countryside in order to protect the environment.
So once again plans were thwarted and the village remained as it is today; a ghost village just metres from the island’s main motorway and yet strangely invisible – just as its original inhabitants were intended to be.
There are many fascinating parts of Tenerife waiting to be discovered by those who chose to leave the standard tourist trail and explore the Real Tenerife.
Lying on a beach all day every day might make for a relaxing holiday, but memories of it fade as quickly as your sun tan. Island Drives is aimed at travellers who want to experience the real essence of Tenerife, not just its pools and beaches. If you want an unforgettable holiday as opposed to a good one, Real Tenerife Island Drives will make the difference.
Times is hard, very hard. While searching for something at the TITSA (Transportes interurbanos de Tenerife, the only public bus company in Tenerife) website, I couldn't help noticing an animated advert in the sidebar for "Sale of used vehicles."
It was well known that TITSA's finances were not in the best of health, which is why they were taken over by the Island Corporation in 2007, but one has to imagine that things have gotten worse. Well, it's either that, or they have lots of new buses to take their place, but that doesn't quite fit in with crisis.
They really do provide a brilliant service. Tenerife natives don't appreciate this, but TITSA services are MUCH more frequent, clean, friendly, on-time and very, very cheap compared to British buses. Use them: keep them afloat, 'coz you know what they say, you never know what you got 'til it's gone.
Meanwhile, can we interest you in this nice Scania, for only 3,600 euros?
This morning, the Canarian Government were awfully proud of themselves in confirming that there were no cases of the gripe porcina (swine flu) in the Canary Islands. Then later reports contained the equally felicitatious news that the Canary Islands had no direct flight links with the areas (of Mexico or the Spanish mainland) affected by the disease.
Then two cases of Swine flu get confirmed in UK, and, of course, Tenerife does have direct flights will all parts of the UK. Bummer. Mega-bummer, when almost ALL your income depends on tourists flying into the islands. Maybe jesting, I hope, Francisco Mesa is already calling for them to "Close the airports!"
Somebody's been having fun tinkering at Wikipedia too, 'coz at the page for Airdrie (so, OK, I had no idea where that is or how close to a major airport it might be), one is currently greeted with a photo of some pigs and the graphic description starting, "Airdrie ... is a squalid little town ..."
Describing the local residents, it calls them "toothless banjo-players, rat-catchers, winos and sash-wearing failed genetic experiments."
Well, they may as well bask in the compliments while they get the chance.
In the Canaries, the British had already been dawbed Vacas Locas (Mad Cows) after BSE (probably aided by our general behaviour and drinking habits), now you can be sure we'll be labelled as Cerdos Volandos (Flying Pigs) too.
Next up will be the disinfectant baths at the airports, mark my words. Either that, or they'll issue us all with bells, like the medieval leper with a bell and sign declaring himself to be “Unclean! Unclean!” … stranger beware!
Couldn't help being nosy when I saw this slogan painted on one of Tenerife's buses going to the Romería in Tegueste. Since it doesn't actually make sense translated literally, what did it mean?
Wanting to know, I popped along to sientoxciento.com to find out.
Apparently, it's an initiative (seemingly, the previous Tenerife Amable (Friendly Tenerife) campaign re-dressed) by the Island Corporation and the Tourist Board to encourage people to "feel Tenerife", whatever that means exactly (a 100% more Tenerify feeling Tenerife, I guess) and continues with an explanation that 5 million tourists visit the island each year and that every gesture counts.
Another way of saying it won't actually hurt to smile and be nice to people.
Companies are urged to participate, amongst other ways, by putting one of the campaign banners on their website, informing staff about it and teaching their personnel that kindness is a fundamental value of service.
Will it work? Well, I suppose it's the thought that counts.
However, they have some rather nice Fondos de escritorio (Desktop wallpapers) of various landmarks in Tenerife, in various sizes to download at this page.
Photo by Petezin
Every year in Tenerife, the rally would take me somewhat by surprise, generally as I would wake up to find our main (only) road closed with no prior warning whatsoever. This year, had I still been living in the same place, I'd have been ready for it ... and, it would have surprised me once again, this time by not happening! :)
It's always at around this time of year that I look out for details of the the first of the rallies on the Tenerife calendar. Last year, that was the 24th Palma Canaria Norte Rally, held in mid-May and, previous years saw the 23rd and 22nd.
Logic would, or it would if we weren't talking about Tenerife, therefore, dictate that this year would be the 25th Anniversary version. And it is, sort of.
A visit to the website of the Federación Interinsular de Automovilismo de Santa Cruz de Tenerife (Island Automobile Federation of Tenerife) reveals that the XXV RALLYE ORVECAME is listed, to be held on May 8th and 9th.
Obviously re-named this year, to something shorter, but totally unmemorable, it is, nevertheless, still billed as the 25th Anniversary event.
The route, however, is completely different to previous years. If you want to find out where it is to go along and watch, it's on mountain roads above La Guancha - San Jose and Realejos - Orotava. You can download the Map (PDF).
The rest of the Tenerife Rally Calendar for 2009 (PDF) - Tenerife events in blue boxes, both rallies proper and subidas (hill climbs) - I'll endeavour to transfer to our calendar for your spectating pleasure in due course.
Enjoying a day of rest can sometimes be very difficult, says this report, which goes on to say that, "There are people who take advantage of weekends and public holidays to undertake work in their homes, bothering the rest of the neighbourhood" (makes it sound like DIY is a much more novel concept in Tenerife than we're used to) and asks, "Can anything be done about it?"
How many of us would like to live without excess noise? Probably the majority, but the society in which we live makes it ever more difficult to achieve. Almost all of us, at some point, make noise that could disturb others, but is it normal for a neighbour to be hammering away at 8 a.m. on a Sunday or public holiday?
The question came up when a resident of Garachico on the north of Tenerife began undertaking work on their house at weekends and on public holidays, which upset others who were trying to enjoy these days to rest.
Was there a rule that covered this? What could be done to combat it?
It turns out that in Garachico, there is a local by-law (published in the BOP de Santa Cruz on April 2nd, 2003, on pages 5677 and 5685) and the ordinance prohibits all kinds of noise (motors, works, music ...) on public holidays, Saturdays and Sundays and, during the week, after 10 p.m.
(In answer to the question, "When can I do my home improvements?", you're going to have to do them between the time you get home from work and the 10 p.m. curfew, take time off, or pay someone else to do it in work hours.)
The document goes further, indicating, for example, that it is not permitted for animals to spend the night, loose on flat roofs of houses (a common practice resulting in dogs that bark at everything that passes), to sound the horn of vehicles, to rev up a vehicle and many other things that make a noise.
Construction works that use pneumatic drills, compressors, cranes and other types of heavy machinery, can only be carried out Monday to Friday (as long as they are not public holidays), between 9 a.m. and 6 p.m.
Incidentally, most towns in Tenerife have similar rules: in others I've lived in the noise ban came in at 11 p.m., or construction work could be carried out on Saturdays, but only up until 2 p.m. (Check with your local town hall.)
Of course there are countless noisy fiestas, bars, traffic, airports ... to counteract all this "peace", otherwise it would be plain surprising that Spain remains the noisiest country in the world, or the second noisiest country in the world, depending on which report you read, with rules like this in force.
Nevertheless, can we have an equivalent by-law in the UK to prohibit the use of bloody hover mowers on Saturdays, Sundays and Bank Holidays please! 
Photo by mrdisaster
Provided Mount Teide doesn't erupt and wipe out the species first, it's never too early to organize the next party in Tenerife - especially the biggest one of them all, the Santa Cruz Carnaval 2010.
Today, Tinerguia announced the contest to design the poster for next year's carnaval. You may not be interested in that (or maybe you will, when you learn that there's a 3,000 euro prize, although I guess that's not a lot compared to the 60,000 euro purse for the racing pigeons), but what you may like to know is the theme for next year's event: La Historia de la Humanidad.
Which translates to The History of Humanity, for readers of English.
A far-reaching subject open to many interpretations and particularly apt, since it all started next-door in Africa, in or about the year 50,000 b.c.
A Very Short History of Humanity says, "Our history is filled with terror, death, treachery, and cruelty, but we are always struggling to be better than we are."
One wonders about the latter when you watch the antics of many. Indeed, from this history of humanity in one picture, it does appear that the only things we see in all periods of time are: sex and violence. All that seems to change through the various eras (and carnavals) are the costumes.
This really has less to do with the Carnaval celebrations than you might imagine, because the record for trouble is actually very good, but this image might give you some ideas on suitable outfits (definitely anything, or nothing, goes.)
And it would be nice to think that, whilst still having lots of fun, people could become more aware of mankind's progress and the wider issues that concern us. For more scholarly reference: UNESCO Collection of History of Humanity.
Carnaval in Santa Cruz de Tenerife, declared of International Tourist Interest, takes place between the 12th and 21st February, 2010, with the Gran Coso Apoteosis - Carnaval's Main Parade on Tuesday, February 16th, 2010.
Photo of a cayuco from Africa, by noborder network
Writer Joe Cawley has recently started counting earthquakes in Spain and he's up to 38 in the last 10 days, including 3 in the Canary Islands.
Earthquake tremors happen pretty regularly around the Canary Islands, so there is probably not much to worry about (she says, crossing her fingers), although I suspect some vulcanologists - folk who study volcanoes not the pointy eared beings off Star Trek - might be paid to tell the archipelago's inhabitants to keep calm and carry on.
Certainly, in context of the recent events in Italy, my guess is folk might be a tad mildly concerned. Indeed, this article in Canarias7 on Tuesday, suggests that the Canary Islands see themselves in the mirror of the Italian disaster and that, "The Canaries could suffer an earthquake similar to that which last week destroyed the Italian city of L'Aquila." Perhaps they could, being the operative word.
The article is quick to point out, however, that seismic activity in the islands is very different to that in Italy. Perhaps it is, but I'm not prepared to translate any of the science, because how would I know whether it was accurate or not?
Historically, however, according to investigations carried out by professor Carmen Romero of the University of La Laguna, the earthquakes prior to the volcanic eruptions of Siete Fuentes, Fasnia and Arafo, between 1704 and 1705, cost around 15 human lives in the Valle de Güímar and it's documented that at least 22 people have died in pre-eruption earthquakes in the Canary Islands.
Apparently, though, say the experts, it's not the earthquakes that kill. Poor construction and bad planning of where to build, causes the problems.
Now that, indeed, might give Tenerife residents cause to be really worried!
As I already, flippantly, replied to someone, the tremors were not strong enough to reach me, but then I'm currently in the UK, so I'd hope not really! 
So, did you feel any of the latest tremors? Do you feel there's cause for concern?
Image: Instituto Geográfico Nacional, the red star marks the epicentre of the 2.1 magnitude quake which took place shortly after 6 a.m. on April 12th.
Today Domingo de Ramos (Palm Sunday) is the first day of Semana Santa (Holy Week), which continues until Domingo de Resurrección (Resurrection or Easter Sunday), in Spain and the Canary Islands. Processions today included La burrita (presumably the little donkey Jesus rode into Jerusalem) and folks will have been out pruning to provide palm fronds for decoration and to distribute amongst worshipers.
Schools broke up on Friday - in the Canaries kids only get this week - and Jueves Santo (Maundy Thursday) and Viernes Santo (Good Friday) are observed as Fiestas Laborales (Public Holidays), whilst Easter Monday is not. There are many events taking place throughout the week, mostly solemn and religious in nature and, if you're Catholic, most likely you know all about those already.
For the rest of us, the main events that may be of interest, from a cultural or artistic point of view, take place on Viernes Santo (Good Friday).
In the town of Adeje, which we'll reiterate is only a short bus (473 will take you to Adeje from Los Cristianos or Playa de Las Américas) or taxi ride from the resorts of the south, in the main street, Calle Grande (see map), starting from 12 noon on Good Friday, April 10th, 2009, you can watch a magnificent reenactment of the Death and Passion of Jesus Christ.
This has become immensely popular with locals and tourists alike, people have been asking about it, so get there early to bag a good viewing spot.
This Vía Crucis (Way of the Cross), to give it it's Latin name, is a piece of really high quality street theatre recreating the last days of the life of Christ; his entry into Jerusalem on a donkey, the Last Supper, through to the Crucifixion and events between, involving a cast of around 300, all in magnificent costume, representing the Biblical events often with squeamishness-inducing realism, while Adeje's public buildings also get parts as extras for the day.
Tinerguia reproduce the entire Easter program in Adeje here (in Spanish), but the photo with the post shows you clearest of all the detail involved.
If you're on the island and you don't make it up to Adeje, as in previous years, the whole - almost 2 hour - extravaganza is to be televised by RTVC.
Here also are videos showing the entire drama from last year.
Missed the Easter celebrations in Tenerife this year? Never mind, there's always another year and here are the dates of Good Friday, right up until the middle of the century.
Friday 10 April 2009
Friday 2 April 2010
Friday 22 April 2011
Friday 6 April 2012
Friday 29 March 2013
Friday 18 April 2014
Friday 3 April 2015
Friday 25 March 2016
Friday 14 April 2017
Friday 30 March 2018
Friday 19 April 2019
Friday 10 April 2020
Friday 2 April 2021
Friday 15 April 2022
Friday 7 April 2023
Friday 29 March 2024
Friday 18 April 2025
Friday 3 April 2026
Friday 26 March 2027
Friday 14 April 2028
Friday 30 March 2029
Friday 19 April 2030
Friday 11 April 2031
Friday 26 March 2032
Friday 15 April 2033
Friday 7 April 2034
Friday 23 March 2035
Friday 11 April 2036
Friday 3 April 2037
Friday 23 April 2038
Friday 8 April 2039
Friday 30 March 2040
Friday 19 April 2041
Friday 4 April 2042
Friday 27 March 2043
Friday 15 April 2044
Friday 7 April 2045
Friday 23 March 2046
Friday 12 April 2047
Friday 3 April 2048
Friday 16 April 2049
Friday 8 April 2050
Also as they did last year, the town of Candelaria is doing their own theatrical representation of La Pasión (The Passion of Christ), this time taking place on Wednesday, April 8th, 2009, starting at 9 p.m. This too looks to be another performance of Biblical proportions, with a cast of 300 and, if you're in Candelaria on Monday or Tuesday, you might also catch the rehearsals taking place in the Plaza de la Patrona de Canarias, where the scenery is being built since last week.
For processions of the type more traditionally known in Spain (particularly those in Seville and other parts of Andalucia), you only need to go north to the former capital of Tenerife, La Laguna.
A common feature in Spain is the almost general usage of the "nazareno" or penitential robe for some of the participants in the Processions. This garment consists in a tunic, a hood with conical tip ( "capirote") used to conceal the face of the wearer, and sometimes a cloak. The exact colours and forms of these robes depend on the particular procession. The robes were widely used in the medieval period for penitents, who could demonstrate their penance while still masking their identity. (These robes intentionally served as the basis for the traditional uniform for members of the Ku Klux Klan in the United States, ironically a very anti-Catholic organization.) Source
In La Laguna on Good Friday, you can see the Procesión Magna, which includes various of these brotherhoods, leaving from the Iglesia de la Concepción at 5 p.m. Then, later at 9 p.m. there's the Procesión del Silencio (Silent Procession), with the penitent brotherhoods accompanying the deceased, again starting from the Iglesia de la Concepción to the church of Santo Domingo de Guzmán.
For kids and others preferring more secular Easter celebrations, the Loro Parque in Puerto de la Cruz usually have an annual corral de los conejitos (bunny enclosure), probably with the odd Easter Egg thrown in.
If none of the above appeals, please don't try going to any of the island's museums in Santa Cruz and La Laguna on Friday, as they will all be closed.
The Spanish Confederation of Hotels and Tourist Accommodations have announced that hotel occupation rates in the Canary Islands will bearly reach 70% during Holy Week, although Tenerife is expecting 85% occupation this week, making it, "an oasis in the middle of the crisis". Yay for that!
CANARIAS TIMELAPSE from luis garcia de armas on Vimeo.
This is a trailer for a documentary entitled CANARIAS TIMELAPSE, from KROMA CANARIAS and LASAL, sponsored by the Canarian Goverment, Tenerife Tourism Corporation, Fuerteventura Corporation and Gran Canaria Corporation, with particpation from Televisión Pública de Canarias.
It shows the 7 islands from the perspective of time, over a whole year, using, as the title suggests, time-lapse photography. In particular, showing those frequent seas of clouds that form over the islands to really superb effect.
The full documentary premieres in Santa Cruz on April 22nd at Cine Renoir-Price, C/ Salamanca 16, 38006 Santa Cruz De Tenerife, at 20:30 hours.
Via: Jose Frechín
If you're looking for something different to do on your Saturday night, Canarian - Catalan group entitled Arepa Funky just arrived from Barcelona and will be playing at the Bar Plaisir, Calle Heraclio Sánchez (see map), 27, (parallel to the Avenida La Trinidad, where the tram terminates), in La Laguna.
Saturday, April 4th, starting at 22:30. Entrance FREE.
It was the name of the group that caught my eye - Arepa being a bread made of corn originating from the northern Andes in South America and made popular in the Canary Islands through emigration / immigration to / from Venezuela ...
Quite what that has to do with Funky music in general or this band in particular, however, remains a complete mystery to me. 
If someone would explain?
Anyway, the blurb says they have an ample repertoire of jazz, soul, blues or experimental music, among other genres and at their MySpace page, you can hear for yourself before you invest the time, but I think you'll agree that they have an excellent tight and musically accomplished sound.
Via: Disfruta Tenerife
The Teno Rural Park, in the far north west of the island is one of the most fascinating (I would say that, it was my home for almost a decade) and unspoiled areas of Tenerife, worthy of exploration and appreciation. Now you too can explore it's charms along it's network of hiking trails.
Download a PDF (in English) giving you the basic information on these footpaths from the Teno Rural website, where it's also available in German and Spanish.
No, it's not a trick question. We all know that old saying, don’t count your chickens before they hatch, meaning don’t assume that you’ll get the things you want until you have them. Presumably, there's no translation of this concept into Spanish, because the Tenerife authorities appear to be counting, if not their chickens, the number of euros of european funds that they think they have to build the port at Granadilla.
The wording on the above sign board says "The present Project is co-financed by the European Union" and mentions an investment (obviously the total, not just the EU bit) of 114,582,734.45 Euros (and I really have to wonder at the person mean enough to mention 45 cents on a 114 million euro project too. 
)
Folk have been saying that the sign is a lie because EU funds had not been granted and, it appears that Brussels has confirmed this and deny that the works on the port are co-financed by the EU. This report goes on to say:
The European Commission confirmed on Tuesday in Brussels, during a meeting of the Committee on Petitions of the European Parliament - which considered a complaint from the Citizens' Platform against the port of Granadilla - that it has not begun the process to provide funds to this port infrastructure in the south of Tenerife, but it has formally accepted the application for the funds.
It's not just the sign though, apparently, the argument that the Canarian Government used to beg the courts not to paralyse the work (the court did stop it) was that they were getting 68 million euros and would lose EU funds. These same ones they've only put an application in for and got no decision on.
Just the application form, nada mas. What the hell are they playing at?
More to the point, dare we hope that now they'll never get the funds?
Image of the offending sign, courtesy of Mataparda.
An article in today's Diario de Avisos mentions the existence of a clinic in Granadilla de Abona, the only council run unit in the Canary Islands, offering physiotherapy and other therapies free to patients suffering with fibromyalgia and chronic fatigue syndrome, as well as to women who have undergone mastectomies. Granadilla Town Hall will, hopefully, know where it is.
You'd almost think this was some sort of April Fool's story, but as I've already explained, that just isn't the custom in Spain and the Canary Islands.
"La Laguna, World Heritage Site and birthplace of wagging tongues", concludes one of the notices that Focho y Susana, the last proprietors of the El Coral fishmongers (founded in La Laguna in 1860), have hung on the doors of their establishment. A short time ago, they decided to close the business, located in the Calle Núñez de la Peña, because they considered it was time to retire.
Fed up with rumours circulating in the district, speculating over the reasons for the closure (from economic crisis and as far as pronouncing the proprietor's death), they decided to clarify matters by putting a notice on the door.
Signed by the owners of the business, the first announced the closure, saying:
"El Coral Fishmonger, founded in La Laguna in 1860, greatly appreciates their distinguished clientele and the general public, the trust during all these years and its subsequent contribution to growth of this family. Apologies for any inconvenience caused by the sudden cessation of activity. Thank you."
But this wasn't enough for local residents. Later, Focho put two more notices up on the adjacent windows. They don't mince words and, translated say:
CLOSED FOR RETIREMENT
I'm alive, thank God.
Up yours (er, culo = arse) tongue waggers!
And it's signed by the owner.
Obviously, we hear about this kind of ignorant speculation and gossiping going on everywhere, so I don't think La Laguna has a particular problem with the phenomenon, but I admire the El Coral spirit in firmly dealing with it. 
"Holiday-makers flying back to Britain from Tenerife were told by their pilot that they could not land because an air traffic controller was on a tea break.
The passengers initially thought his announcement was an April Fool's Day joke, but it wasn't. The plane had to circle for almost half an hour before the air traffic controller came back to work."
Source: Masterwordsmith-Unplugged. Te he, you'd have thought the British would find the tea break story more plausible than to think it a joke.
If they'd been travelling in the opposite direction, to Tenerife, it would be unlikely to happen, unless they were travelling on December 28th.
You might think it's a bit early to be preparing even for next year's Carnaval, but we really do have a l list of Tenerife Carnaval dates right through to the middle of the century for you - to the year 2050. Tenerife has a poor reputation where events are seldom publicised sufficiently in advance - hopeless when you need to book flights, hotels or holidays, months ahead - so this guide hopes to partially overcome that problem and should provide just enough notice to satisfy even the most fervently obsessive of forward planners. 
(We left last year's and this years on to show you that the theory works.)
| YEAR | Santa Cruz Main Parade | Burial of the Sardine | Puerto de la Cruz Parade |
| 2008 | Feb 05 | Feb 06 | Feb 09 |
| 2009 | Feb 24 | Feb 25 | Feb 28 |
| 2010 | Feb 16 | Feb 17 | Feb 20 |
| 2011 | Mar 08 | Mar 09 | Mar 12 |
| 2012 | Feb 21 | Feb 22 | Feb 25 |
| 2013 | Feb 12 | Feb 13 | Feb 16 |
| 2014 | Mar 04 | Mar 05 | Mar 08 |
| 2015 | Feb 17 | Feb 18 | Feb 21 |
| 2016 | Feb 09 | Feb 10 | Feb 13 |
| 2017 | Feb 28 | Mar 01 | Mar 04 |
| 2018 | Feb 13 | Feb 14 | Feb 17 |
| 2019 | Mar 05 | Mar 06 | Mar 09 |
| 2020 | Feb 25 | Feb 26 | Feb 29 |
| 2021 | Feb 16 | Feb 17 | Feb 20 |
| 2022 | Mar 01 | Mar 02 | Mar 05 |
| 2023 | Feb 21 | Feb 22 | Feb 25 |
| 2024 | Feb 13 | Feb 14 | Feb 17 |
| 2025 | Mar 04 | Mar 05 | Mar 08 |
| 2026 | Feb 17 | Feb 18 | Feb 21 |
| 2027 | Feb 09 | Feb 10 | Feb 13 |
| 2028 | Feb 29 | Mar 01 | Mar 04 |
| 2029 | Feb 13 | Feb 14 | Feb 17 |
| 2030 | Mar 05 | Mar 06 | Mar 09 |
| 2031 | Feb 25 | Feb 26 | Mar 01 |
| 2032 | Feb 10 | Feb 11 | Feb 14 |
| 2033 | Mar 01 | Mar 02 | Mar 05 |
| 2034 | Feb 21 | Feb 22 | Feb 25 |
| 2035 | Feb 06 | Feb 07 | Feb 10 |
| 2036 | Feb 26 | Feb 27 | Mar 01 |
| 2037 | Feb 17 | Feb 18 | Feb 21 |
| 2038 | Mar 09 | Mar 10 | Mar 13 |
| 2039 | Feb 22 | Feb 23 | Feb 26 |
| 2040 | Feb 14 | Feb 15 | Feb 18 |
| 2041 | Mar 05 | Mar 06 | Mar 09 |
| 2042 | Feb 18 | Feb 19 | Feb 22 |
| 2043 | Feb 10 | Feb 11 | Feb 14 |
| 2044 | Mar 01 | Mar 02 | Mar 05 |
| 2045 | Feb 21 | Feb 22 | Feb 25 |
| 2046 | Feb 06 | Feb 07 | Feb 10 |
| 2047 | Feb 26 | Feb 27 | Mar 02 |
| 2048 | Feb 18 | Feb 19 | Feb 22 |
| 2049 | Mar 02 | Mar 03 | Mar 06 |
| 2050 | Feb 22 | Feb 23 | Feb 26 |
The key date for Carnaval Events in Tenerife is Shrove Tuesday, which is when the Gran Coso Apoteosis - Carnaval's Main Parade - takes place in the capital, Santa Cruz. This is the same day as Mardi Gras in New Orleans, so we've borrowed their dates and added them to the Carnival Calendar at PuntoInfo.
Many of the other events follow a regular pattern backward or forward from that date. At least they do, mostly, in Santa Cruz and Puerto de la Cruz. We had hoped to include the Los Cristianos Carnaval dates in this table too, but we discovered that arrangements there are more of a moving target than a moveable feast, so it isn't possible to predict their timetable with the same certainty.
Those are the main "spectator sport" events that I believe you could be interested in seeing as a casual visitor. In the run up to the Carnaval, there are many other contests and events involving all the various singing and dancing troupes that form part of the Carnaval and, of course, alongside all of this is the fun fair, the food stalls, orchestras, dancing and concerts that go on in the streets until dawn ... and, just when you think it's all over, it all moves on to Los Cristianos, Los Gigantes and many other towns a week or two later.
If you're staying in the south of Tenerife, there's no problem as extra buses are laid on each year, even during the night, which will take Carnaval goers between Playa de las Americas / Los Cristianos and Santa Cruz. Don't take a car, because there will be nowhere to park it. Catch the 111 bus from Las Americas bus station or Los Cristianos and enjoy the journey that's an extension of the party!
Anywhere you might usually stay, such as the resorts on the south of the island.
However, if you're coming to Tenerife for the express reason of going to Carnaval, then you may as well stay right in the thick of things, so you can sleep by day, just falling out of your hotel into the street in the afternoon or evening when there are parades or events you want to go to.
In Santa Cruz, we can recommend, because we've stayed there, the Hotel Pelinor. It may only have 2 stars (don't expect a high level of English), but it's clean and has everything you need for the purpose. If you must go the the beach, Las Teresitas is just up the road.
There are other hotels in Santa Cruz listed here.
You can wear anything you like and nothing is too risque, although people not in costume / fancy dress are the odd ones out. Each year, each carnaval has a theme, but it is not necessary to follow that unless you wish to do so. If you're a man, it's almost obligatory to dress up as a woman - however unconvincingly: excess hair need not be removed - and cross-dressing is essential when attending The Burial of the Sardine.
DISCLAIMER: Of course, all of these details are subject to changes that are way beyond our control. Hopefully, Carnaval will continue in more or less the same manner for the foreseeable future, especially when you consider that it has already overcome prohibitions during dictatorships and survived for more than 200 years and possibly as many as 400, but nothing is guaranteed.
We've taken great care to check dates and take leap years into account when working out the dates of the various parades, but we accept no responsibility for errors (probably due to going cross-eyed.) Use this as a guide and double-check nearer to your dates of travel for best results. Batteries not included.
Well, maybe they're not bringing the Madrid museum's bricks and mortar to the island, but there's an itinerant exhibition consisting of "an important selection" of still-lifes (around 60 works from an impressive list of artists, among them Francisco de Goya), on loan from Spain's National Art Gallery (El Prado in Madrid), until May 31st, at the Espacio Cultural de CajaCanarias, Plaza del Patriotismo, Santa Cruz de Tenerife.
View Larger MapThe exhibition is called El bodegón español en el Prado and you can find more more details (in Spanish) at El Prado's own website. Don't go looking for the opening times though, 'coz I can't find that kind of useful information anywhere (This Is Tenerife, after all.) You can probably assume the usual Spanish business hours, not to early start, with perhaps a siesta and late opening.
Tinerguia to the rescue: opening times are, Monday to Friday, 11:00 to 13:00 and 17:00 to 21:00. Saturdays, 11:00 to 14:00 and 17:00 to 20:00.
Tinerguia also mention "the extraordinary quality of the works."
And as typically longwinded as the press release is, it also doesn't appear to pick up on the fact that the exhibition was inaugurated yesterday, March 30th, which was Goya's 263rd birthday either.
Photo of the exterior facade of the Prado Museum in Madrid by ReservasdeCoches.com - Car Rental in Madrid.
Curious point for students of Spanish: still lifes are called naturalezas muertas (literally, dead natures), which is a bit of a glass half-empty view, isn't it? Think I prefer the English version this time, of capturing a living moment.
Well, we can hope. The MEP for Los Verdes (The Greens) David Hammerstein is convinced that the controversial industrial port planned to be built in Granadilla, is "fatally wounded" because "they [the EU / Europe] are discovering that the arguments and reports provided by the Spanish and Canarian authorities to justify the project are, at the very least, questionable. "
More (in Spanish) in this article in La Opinión de Tenerife. Interestingly, the photo of the sign board announcing the works on the port (currently suspended by the courts) is shown because it states that the project is co-financed by the EU. This, say The Greens, is clear evidence of the lies surrounding the project, because not one euro has been granted from Europe for this infrastructure.
Via: Canarias dice NO AL PUERTO DE GRANADILLA Facebook group
A question that people often ask, is how far is Tenerife from the UK. The distance between London, England and the capital of the island of Tenerife, Santa Cruz de Tenerife, is approximately 1,800 miles or 2,897 kilometres, "as the crow flies".
Click here to book flights to Tenerife via Flightline
But we haven't seen many crows on holiday, so here are the distances between the main 
UK & Irish airports offering direct flights to Tenerife:
Flights from England to Tenerife
Birmingham (BHX) - Tenerife South (TFS) - 1849 miles (2976 kilometres)
Blackpool (BLK) - Tenerife South (TFS) - 1904 miles (3064 kilometres)
Bournemouth (BOH) - Tenerife South (TFS) - 1748 miles (2813 kilometres)
Bristol (BRS) - Tenerife South (TFS) - 1764 miles (2839 kilometres)
Doncaster Sheffield (DSA) - Tenerife South (TFS) - 1926 miles (3100 kilometres)
Durham Tees (MME) - Tenerife South (TFS) - 1979 miles (3184 kilometres)
East Midlands (EMA) - Tenerife South (TFS) - 1881 miles (3027 kilometres)
Leeds Bradford (LBA) - Tenerife South (TFS) - 1936 miles (3116 kilometres)
Liverpool (LPL) - Tenerife South (TFS) - 1880 miles (3026 kilometres)
London Luton (LTN) - Tenerife South (TFS) - 1846 miles (2971 kilometres)
London Gatwick (LGW) - Tenerife South (TFS) - 1809 miles (2911 kilometres)
London Gatwick (LGW) - Tenerife North (TFN) - 1775 miles (2857 kilometres)
London Stansted (STN) - Tenerife South (TFS) - 1861 miles (2995 kilometres)
Manchester (MAN) - Tenerife South (TFS) - 1893 miles (3046 kilometres)
Newcastle (NCL) - Tenerife South (TFS) - 2007 miles (3230 kilometres)
Source: Great Circle Mapper and Metric Conversions Via: Yahoo Answers.
Flights from Scotland to Tenerife
The distance to Tenerife from Scottish airports will be a wee bit further:
Aberdeen (ABZ) - Tenerife South (TFS) - 2132 miles (3431 kilometres)
Edinburgh (EDI) - Tenerife South (TFS) - 2034 miles (3273 kilometres)
Glasgow (GLA) - Tenerife South (TFS) - 2013 miles (3240 kilometres)
Prestwick (PIK) - Tenerife South (TFS) - 1988 miles (3199 kilometres)
Flights from Wales to Tenerife
Cardiff (CWL) - Tenerife South (TFS) - 1752 miles (2820 kilometres)
Flights from Northern Ireland to Tenerife
Belfast (BFS) - Tenerife South (TFS) - 1909 miles (3072 kilometres)
Flights from Eire to Tenerife
Cork (ORK) - Tenerife South (TFS) - 1695 miles (2727 kilometres)
Dublin (DUB) - Tenerife South (TFS) - 1828 miles (2941 kilometres)
Shannon (SNN) - Tenerife South (TFS) - 1746 miles (2810 kilometres)
We were quite amused by World Airport Codes who not only quote the distance between London Gatwick (LGW) and Tenerife South (TFS), but also estimate how long it would take in various types of aircraft. (The flight to Tenerife from any UK location is around 4 hours, a bit more from the north and Scotland.)
It's a pity the Boeing 747 or Airbus A340 are not operated on the route, because the estimate is that they'd cut the time down to 3 hours and 12 minutes.
Be glad your holiday flight isn't in a Cessna SkyHawk, however, as they estimate the journey time from Gatwick to Tenerife in one of those as 12 hours and 46 minutes. Does that include fuel stops at every post, I wonder? 
But, the pace of life in Tenerife is leisurely, so why rush to get there?
If you follow the walking directions - well they don't do flying routes - provided by Google (see map). (Do, please, heed the warning that walking directions are in beta and may be missing sidewalks or pedestrian paths; especially the bits over water, we reckon, although they do let you "cheat" and use the Portsmouth - Bilbao and the Cadiz - Santa Cruz ferries.) Going that route, your mileage increases to 2208 (3553 km) and it'll only take you about 12 days 2 hours!
Four teams will compete between April 18 and October 31 for the championship of the island of Tenerife in the 2009 Canarian Baseball League.
The teams are the Caribeños (Caribbeans), Halcones (Hawks), Marlins (Marlins) and Tiburones (Sharks) and games will take place at the Centro Insular de Béisbol El Burgado (The Island Baseball Center at 
El Burgado, Puerto de la Cruz).
Tournament games will be played on the Saturdays when home team, the Marlins don't have home games in the Division of Honor.
Fixtures April - July are listed here and August to October games here.
Via: Federación Canaria de Béisbol y Sófbol
A total of 425 model planes, from 119 countries, "landed" at the Pueblo Chico theme park in La Orotava (see map), Tenerife on Friday and will remain on display until April 12th. The commercial and military aircraft, in various scales, form just part of a private collection, put together over a period of 30 years by Miguel Ángel Artiles Viera, with everything from a model of the largest aircraft in the world, the Airbus 380, to a model of the first aircraft from 1903.
Artiles recalled that in his early collection, way back in the 60s, the models had "comprised of thousands of pieces with the instructions in English." And you thought you had problems constructing Airfix kits!
While the exhibition is on, visitors can enter a draw to win model planes or tickets for real flights with Binter Canarias and Islas Airways.
Photo of the model airport at Pueblo Chico: Tenerife-Photo
Facade of the Tenerife Espacio de las Artes (TEA), that will be in darkness for half and hour later tonight. Photo: by Mataparda. After the apagón (huge powercut) that left almost the entire island without electricity for several hours already on Thursday, March 26th, it's hard to imagine that Earth Hour will have many supporters willing to voluntarily switch off their luz (light / power) again on the island tonight. Or maybe Unelco's failures give even more reason for joining in.
As an aside, earliest reports suggested that Thursday's blackout had been caused by lightening striking a substation - may turn out to be their main power station at Las Caletillas (Candelaria). And whilst lightening is still given as a likely cause, in more recent reports, CEO of Unelco Endesa, Pablo Casado, says it will take them several weeks to to discover the cause of the incident.
Call me an old cynic if you like (and certainly, I'm not a member of the Unelco Fan Club), but from that, I have to wonder if they mean it will take them several weeks to come up with a [vaguely plausible] excuse to save admitting that they've failed, yet again, to make the necessary investments in installations or carry out maintenance, in order to provide a service of the quality that should reasonably be expected in this century and for the price.
Unelco were already sanctioned over their rusty old pylons that couldn't stand up the ravishes of stormy weather during Tropical Storm Delta in 2005.
There are those who criticize Earth Hour saying it's a meaningless gesture, others say Earth Hour Causes Global Warming, because if you use one candle for each extinguished light bulb, you’re essentially not cutting CO2 at all, or worse.
Nevertheless, Tenerife is joining in. Though hopefully not all as half-heartedly as the Cabildo (Tenerife Island Corporation), who it's reported here, will be switching off the lights on the Palacio Insular and the exterior facades of the Tenerife Espacio de las Artes (TEA), the Centro Internacional de Ferias y Congresos and the Auditorio de Tenerife for 30 minutes (between 8.30 p.m. and 9 p.m.) Earth Hour (small clue) an hour = 60 minutes!
Even if it is just a gesture it counts: it's an hour, which is not that long. Effectively saying we don't treat it seriously enough to go the whole way, or we can get away with only 50% commitment, set's what kind of example to people? Join in or don't, but doing it half-cocked, seems to me to only be taking the piss.
NB: Theoretically the switch-off will be going on at the same time in Tenerife as in the UK (from 8:30 p.m. to 9:30 p.m.) and, equally, the clocks in Tenerife will also "spring" forward an hour tonight, doing islanders out of an hour of sleep.
Headlines such as "Los Rodeos closed by fog" should become a thing of the past in June this year, when the Tenerife North Airport gets a new and upgraded (from the current category I to a level II/III) Instrument Landing System (ILS) that will allow planes to make full instrument landings on autopilot.
The new system will require, amongst other things, special lighting on the runway and was to have been operative in the first quarter of the year, but this date has been delayed. Spanish airports authority, (AENA) have now announced the date of June 12th for the new system to come into operation.
There are very few Spanish airports (mostly those in the north of the country) that have the type of ILS system that Los Rodeos is to have and the principle reason is to reduce the number of disruptions to flights that have to be delayed, cancelled or diverted to other airports, when there is low visibility.
Los Rodeos already has ground radar installed to prevent occurrences like the 1977 runway incursion that took place, in fog, 32 years ago today.
