Wednesday, September 17, 2008
Tenerife's Wet South - Siam Park
It might have been a few months late, it wouldn’t be Tenerife if it wasn’t, but this week the newest tourist Mecca in Europe, the aquatic theme park, Siam Park finally had it’s inauguration.
On Monday night, the hoi polloi of Tenerife’s society ‘glamm’d’ themselves up and headed to a hill overlooking Playa de Las Américas to see what the fuss was all about.
HRH Princess Maha Chakri Sirindhorn of Thailand did the honours by cutting the garlanded ribbon and declaring Siam Park open in front of a handful of Thai supporters and a heaving throng of press who were pushing and shoving to get a photograph as though Keira Knightley had just turned up wearing a bikini. Incidentally the press ‘box’ was situated facing such dignitaries as Ricardo Melchior (President of the Cabildo of Tenerife) and Paulino Rivero (President of the Canary Islands) which meant that when the Princess arrived and was greeted by both, photographers were treated to a great view of the back of the Princess’ head.
By that point most of the 2000 or so invited guests were already inside the park having a nosey around, which is what everybody was really interested in.
Walking through palatial doors and finding that suddenly you’ve been transported from Tenerife to Thailand is bordering on the surreal, but there’s no denying the impact of being faced by a ‘village’ of traditional wooden Thai huts with panelled walls and elegantly curved roofs. Thai architecture is stunningly beautiful and some might view the collection of stilted buildings out of place on a Canarian hillside, but they’re no more out of place than the mock Roman/Grecian palace in the resort below and they’re a hell of a lot more pleasing on the eye than most of the concrete rectangles found between Siam Park and the sea.
On the porch of the ‘floating market’, a couple of heartbreakingly beautiful Thai girls with flawless complexions painted delicate patterns on silk umbrellas and carved elaborate shapes from watermelons (hmmm…beautiful girls with impressive melons; the next line is just too easy and cheesy).
But what of the rides themselves? It all might look very nice, but ultimately this is a theme park meant to thrill. A few lucky local youths had been picked to demonstrate the rides and the screams which preceded their appearance at tubes which emerged from beneath giant Khon mask sculptures, dragons and replicas of towering ancient temples suggested they were having a masochistically good time, even if some looked a bit shell-shocked (the near vertical ‘Tower of Power’ looks as though only fools and those with suicidal tendencies would attempt it).
As the chic designer dresses and suits headed to the ‘Palace of Waves’ for the inauguration speeches, discovering that stilettos and sand aren’t compatible, and the kids in their swimwear rocketed through transparent tubes one last time, watched by tropical fish with glinting eyes, darkness fell over the ‘Water Kingdom’.
Siam Park won’t be everyone’s cup of tea, but it’s aesthetically pleasing on the eye and the rides look imaginative and thrilling; in short it looks like good fun, which is pretty much its aim. There have been debates on blogsites about why a Thai and not a Canarian theme was chosen for the park; however, as a friend commented during a visit to the upmarket end of Playa de Las Américas:
“It’s all very nice, but it could be Dubai, or Las Vegas.”
If the resort that Siam Park is located above isn’t in the slightest bit Canarian, why should it be?
On a final note, the rocks around the pools aren’t made from cardboard as some websites suspected, but they aren’t stone either…
Siam Park is open to the public from Wednesday 17th September; price €28 adults (€25 residents); €18 children 3 -11 years (€16 residents)
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